Children and adolescents: Exhaling… stress!

I remember the first time I felt intense anxiety was when I was waiting for the results of my sixth grade exams to go to high school at a different school. Had I passed? And if not, what would I do? At that time, we didn't use the word "stress" to describe this feeling. However, today, this intense worry would be recognized as anxiety about the unknown. Whether we are young or old, we all face anxiety and feel stress and it is completely normal. Up to a point.

Are anxiety and stress the same thing?

Although stress and anxiety are similar in symptoms, there is a big difference between them. Stress is related to a specific situation, it is an emotion that we experience in the present. It is the immediate reaction of the body and mind to a challenge. For example, when you see the bus coming and you run to the stop to catch it. Your heart beats faster, your breathing becomes shallow and your whole body is in a state of alertness. As soon as you get on the bus and take a deep breath, the stress subsides. However, there is also chronic stress that occurs when the pressure lasts for a long time, such as when there are family conflicts or when a child faces a demanding school year. In this case, the body remains in a state of hyperarousal for a longer period of time, which can have negative effects on physical and mental health.

Anxiety, on the other hand, is less specific. It is often not related to an immediate situation and refers to future events and concerns. It is that feeling that arises when we think about possible problems or negative scenarios that could happen. While stress subsides once the situation that causes it is resolved, anxiety can persist even when there is no immediate threat.

However, it seems that many things have changed since I was a child. We live in an era of stress and anxiety. Many children and adolescents experience intense pressure that they find difficult to express or find ways to deal with. The increasing school demands, social situations, their internal needs, physical and hormonal changes, the creation of identity, create a constant feeling of worry, stress and anxiety which can manifest itself in various ways, such as difficulty concentrating, irritability, insomnia, and even physical symptoms such as headaches or stomachaches. This emotional burden not only affects their mental health, but also their general quality of life, limiting the joy and carefreeness that they are entitled to feel at this age. As parents, there are several ways and support programs to deal with anxiety and stress, however, the simplest, most natural and direct way to manage them is breathing. It is the most valuable and powerful "tool" that we all have and can use at any time in the most difficult moments.

How is breathing connected to stress management?

Breathing is inextricably linked to our physical and mental state. When we feel anxious or stressed, our body activates the “fight or flight” mechanism, resulting in shallow and rapid breathing, increased heart rate, and a constant state of alertness. This response, which is useful in situations of danger, becomes harmful when it lasts and occurs frequently due to anxiety.

In contrast, when we breathe slowly and deeply, the parasympathetic nervous system of “calm and relaxation” is activated, which helps to relax and balance stress levels. By learning and practicing proper breathing techniques, children and adolescents (and adults) can calm down in times of stress, whether it’s a demanding school assignment, a test, a difficult social interaction, or a negative experience. And the earlier children acquire this skill, the easier it will be for them to manage their stress in adulthood and learn how to face challenges and deal with big emotions in a healthy way.

Breathwork, breathing techniques to help children focus their attention away from stress

One of the most well-known "tricks" to help children cope with stress is simple breathing exercises. They're so easy to do, they'll see them as a game!

For young children:

1. We smell the cookie.

You tell them to imagine they are holding a warm, freshly baked cookie in their hand. Inhale through their nose to smell the chocolate chips or sweet vanilla, then blow gently to cool it down. Take 3-5 breaths together.

2. We smell the flowers.

Another fun breathing exercise is to go to the park, if you don't have a garden or flowers on your porch, and smell the flowers. Or you can go to a flower shop and ask him to pick out a flower he likes, take a deep breath and smell its beautiful aroma, and then take a deep breath.

3. We blow out the candle.

You tell the child to imagine that he is holding a candle in his hand. He takes a deep breath through his nose and very slowly exhales, gently blowing out the candle.

For teenagers

1. Guided visualization

This is a method of focused relaxation. They close their eyes and imagine that they are in a beautiful and peaceful place. It can be at sea or in the mountains, in a forest or on a beach. They focus all their attention on this place. You tell them to experience it in every detail, to inhale deeply, feeling their body fill with calm, and to exhale slowly, eliminating all tension from their body. Duration 10-15 minutes.

2. Diaphragmatic breathing

Sit down and lie on your back. Ask them to place their left palm on their chest and their right palm on their abdomen. With their eyes closed, they should inhale deeply, feeling their abdomen expand, and exhale slowly, feeling their abdomen return to its normal position. They should repeat this breathing for 5 minutes.

How to incorporate breathing exercises into everyday life

Incorporating these techniques into the daily lives of children and adolescents can offer them a valuable tool for managing the stress and pressure of everyday life, as well as for boosting their self-confidence. Let's teach our children to "exhale" stress and inhale calmness, enjoying their benefits at various times of the day, such as: before studying or exams, a few minutes of controlled breathing helps to improve concentration and allows the mind to function more clearly. While before bed, slow and deep breaths contribute to relaxation, reduce the tension of the day and contribute to a quality and restful sleep. During difficult moments, conscious breathing can act as an anchor of calm, offering a sense of inner peace and self-control.

One more thing: Breathing exercises are done in a quiet space, without distractions like the TV or loud noises. They can be done on the couch, in a chair, or even sitting on the floor. It is also essential for older children and teens to understand that these techniques are not a competition or test of endurance. They are not holding their breath or feeling pressured to do the exercises perfectly. The goal is to learn to relax, connect with their breath, and allow their body and mind to calm down naturally.

(the article was first published: https://www.infokids.gr/paidia-kai-efivoi-ekpneontas-to-stres-efkoles-askiseis-anapnois-gia-iremia-kai-kali-diathesi/)